We all have a "thing."
I vividly remember the moment when this realization hit me. It was during my early college years, a time when I was at my most unhealthy state. I spent countless hours comparing myself to others, convinced that they had it all figured out while I was falling short.
I would look across the classroom, the auditorium, or even the sidewalk, seeing people who appeared to have perfect lives. Meanwhile, I would scrutinize myself, always finding flaws and shortcomings. That's how the unhealthy version of Tiffany showed up in the world—full of self-criticism and comparison.
But as my world expanded, and I began to know people on a deeper level, a profound truth emerged: everyone has a thing.
Every person has something that stands in their way, hindering them from pursuing their dreams, making decisions, or having the confidence to be their best selves. It became clear that even though someone may appear perfect, if you dig deep enough, you'll find that they have a thing too.
Currently, we're in the midst of Kyler's takeover on Scared Confident (Part 1, Part 2, Part 3). He's bravely sharing his thing—his battle with anxiety. At the beginning of this podcast journey, I shared my own thing: fear. It had a stronghold on me, dictating my decisions and preventing me from pursuing my dreams. It was time to break free.
Perhaps you find yourself in a similar place today. You may be looking at the world around you, observing strangers, or even acquaintances, and longing to trade your thing for their seemingly perfect life. But let me assure you, they have a thing too. No one is exempt.
The crucial choice lies in how we respond to our thing.
Some of us try to ignore it, bury it, or push through, as I did with my fear. But instead of accepting and addressing it head-on, we end up bobbing and weaving, navigating cluttered tunnels in our lives, draining our energy and hindering our progress.
So, what is your thing? Can you name it? Take hold of it? I encourage you to take ownership and speak it aloud. Share it with someone who genuinely cares about you. Acknowledge that you don't want it to have control over your life. You don't want it to filter your worldview, relationships, or opportunities. It's time to reclaim your power.
Now, let me be clear—I'm not a therapist or an expert in solving these things overnight. But the first step is acknowledging it, naming it, and seeking resources and support from people who can walk alongside you on this journey. Find someone you trust, someone who will hold you accountable, and share your struggles with them. You don't have to face it alone.
In my own experience, this podcast became a source of accountability as I embarked on my Fear Journey. Each week, I had to drop an episode, which kept me pushing forward, seeking new insights, and staying committed. The microphone became my ally, creating a sense of responsibility to keep moving, to keep growing.
For Kyler, his commitment to excellence, both for himself and the people in our organization, served as his accountability to confront his anxiety. By naming it, accepting it, and understanding that it was a part of his journey, he found the strength to take ownership. This commitment to growth became a driving force in his life.
But here's the thing: when you decide to address your thing, it won't magically disappear overnight. It's not about finding a quick fix. It's about equipping yourself with a toolbox to navigate it, to know how it affects your body, and to regain control. People in our organization face depression, trauma, loss, and perfectionism—the list goes on.
Having a thing doesn't make us broken; it makes us human.
The gift we possess as humans is the ability to name our thing, to share it, and to support one another on our individual journeys toward becoming the best versions of ourselves in the context of our thing. Let's not be ashamed of it or try to hide it. Let's refuse to let it hold power over the outcomes of our lives.
I've witnessed incredible transformations when individuals refuse to let their thing own them. It begins with admitting its presence and then seeking the support and resources needed to navigate through it. Remember, the first solution may not be perfect, nor the second. But with time, you'll gather the tools necessary to grow and move forward.
I am incredibly proud of Kyler for stepping into vulnerability and openly discussing his anxiety. But as you listen to his story, don't limit it to anxiety alone. Apply the lessons to your own thing. What desperately wants to control your life, dreams, and potential? Refuse to let it. Name it, find someone to share it with, and seek a process of accountability. When my husband and I wanted to rebuild our marriage, we sought counseling—a process that kept us committed to our goals. Find the support system and the tools that work for you.
Lastly, remember that you are not alone. We all have a thing, and we all have the capacity to overcome it. Embrace the journey, and don't settle for anything less than the life you deserve. Together, we can break free from the hold of our things and live with courage, purpose, and authenticity.
So, take a step today. Name your thing, find your support system, and let's conquer our obstacles together. You've got this, and I'm here cheering you on.