[00:00:00] Tiffany Sauder: I had someone tell me once, do you tell your kids as much about where you're failing as it is where you're winning? And I think that that's like just normalizing that part of being an adult. And I think also be fun. Like be a place they want to be. Have good ideas, be creative. Show them that life can be an adventure.

[00:00:20] Tiffany Sauder: I am Tiffany Sauder, entrepreneur, wife, mom to four girls, and a woman figuring it out just like you. If you're tired of living a life of have to and finally ready to build a life of want to, then you're in the right place. Come on, let's go Build your Life of And.

[00:00:44] Tiffany Sauder: I have kind of a special episode today. Sam's back on the mic with me.

[00:00:48] Samantha Johnson: Yeah, we're doing something a little different today. So we sent out a question to our email list and just said, ask Tiffany anything. What would you ask her? Personal professional. Yeah, nothing is off limit. So we have gathered questions from newsletter lists, questions from LinkedIn.

[00:01:01] Samantha Johnson: If you are not on our newsletter list, join it. There's a link in the show notes. But yeah, this is all things, so we have things from the navigating holiday season to how Tiffany is raising daughters and running a business to what she actually drinks every morning. Oh, wow. So we're covering it all. Well, I haven't, I haven I have not said any of these to Tiffany.

[00:01:20] Samantha Johnson: She has not seen them to make it more like real in, in time to see what she says. So. There's gonna be a big variety. We'll see how it goes. Do I have brut breath in my teeth? No. Do I? I actually thought I might, do I? No. Oh, I just felt like maybe I did. Yeah, I thought I did. So I'm glad you asked. Mm-hmm.

[00:01:37] Samantha Johnson: Let's get into it though, because we have a lot to get through. We probably won't get through them all, but hey, let's do best as far as we can and we'll see. Alright, so we're gonna start with one that is like on top of everyone's mind as we're like mid-November and it is the holiday season. So here's the question.

[00:01:51] Samantha Johnson: We are entering one of the busiest seasons in motherhood. What are practical tips for getting ahead around gift shopping, travel gatherings, holiday parties, gifts for teachers mixing in holiday magic? I want to do it too, but also put a ton of pressure on myself to make magic for my kids.

[00:02:08] Tiffany Sauder: Yes, I'm gonna share some things that I do somewhere along the line.

[00:02:13] Tiffany Sauder: The idea of making magic for your kids, like I think there are. Just some insane standard set just from what we can see in very curated moments on like people's Pinterest boards and stuff. Like you guys have to remember that is what a lot of those people do for a living.

[00:02:30] Samantha Johnson: Mm-hmm. Is

[00:02:31] Tiffany Sauder: decorate a front door and get their family in matching pajamas and all that kind of stuff.

[00:02:35] Tiffany Sauder: Mm-hmm. So I have a few very core things that I always do that makes it so that I'm not resolving for how to make it magical. We always do a family dinner on Christmas Eve and I let my girls make the menu and so they'll spend some time like, you know, on Pinterest. Sometimes it's new stuff we've never done before, but they always pick the menu on Christmas Eve.

[00:02:57] Tiffany Sauder: I always get everybody pajamas. I sort of have let go of the matching thing, just mm-hmm. My girls are really far apart and somebody's annoyed. And then for gifts for like my housekeeper and my nanny and like, not my nanny, but my h, just like all the people who help me, my hairdresser, teachers, all that kind of stuff.

[00:03:14] Tiffany Sauder: I buy the same thing for everybody. I get William Sonoma, that chocolate pepper, get the peppermint bark pepper. I go buy like 35 of them, so many of them. And I do that a Christmas card and some money. And the money varies. I go by like probably 20. $25 gift cards from Starbucks and I just have like this area that has two or three things and I mix and match it with like a pretty bow a picture of our family, which we're not doing this year.

[00:03:43] Tiffany Sauder: But usually I do Christmas cards and that's what I do. And it's like kind of expensive to buy yourself. I think a package of that is like $30 or something like that. And then a gift card from a couple different places with a note. I don't have the space to personalize it in that season because there's so many people that I'm buying for.

[00:04:00] Tiffany Sauder: And so I've just made it like super easy and I have like a station and I just pick and pull from it. Sometimes I'll do a pile of my favorite things. I love that. Eucalyptus shower spray. I guess I'm going through some of our like gift guide stuff. Yeah. But I, I'll have like mascara as I love like just some stuff.

[00:04:18] Tiffany Sauder: 'cause I'm generally buying for women teachers, hairdresser. Those kinds of people. And so I'll have just like a stockpile of things and I pull it together and it's just a station and I don't make each of them so unique that it becomes this huge project. I have a note on my phone of everybody that I need to buy for, and then usually on Cyber Monday or Good Friday, I will give myself a few hours and just bang it out.

[00:04:42] Tiffany Sauder: If your kids are not using Giftful. Make them use Giftful. It's amazing. Do you know what it is? What's Giftful? No, I've never heard that. Okay. It's like basically an Amazon wishlist. Okay. It's an app, it's free and they can go and provide links to all the stuff that they want and then give it to like you and grandma's and all this kind of stuff.

[00:04:59] Tiffany Sauder: And then you Mark purchased if you bought it. Because I was like brokering like my 10-year-old wants this American Girl Doll. Yes. And then my mom and And Jr's mom would both buy it. Yes. And then whoever got to it first felt like the hero and the other one felt like zero. Totally. Annoying.

[00:05:14] Samantha Johnson: Yeah, we'll put a link in.

[00:05:15] Samantha Johnson: Show notes.

[00:05:16] Tiffany Sauder: Giftful. Yeah. For people. Yeah. It's very good. And honestly, just like, even for yourself, it's kind of helpful when people are like, what would you like? It's like, I don't know.

[00:05:22] Samantha Johnson: Mm-hmm.

[00:05:23] Tiffany Sauder: So Giftful is a real hack.

[00:05:24] Samantha Johnson: We have our gift guide too. I feel like you should mention that. The gift guide.

[00:05:28] Samantha Johnson: Yeah. Yeah.

[00:05:30] Tiffany Sauder: Yeah. So we, yeah, we've put together, I don't know, just my favorite things to give. Mm-hmm. And think about the things you love to use, like it's so meaningful. Most of us have everything we need in life, quote unquote. And so when somebody shares with you. Like a lotion they love or a mascara they love, or a lip gloss, they're loving.

[00:05:47] Tiffany Sauder: Or a spice that like works so great on their favorite, you know, dish with a recipe like that is as meaningful. I feel like at the season in life as, I don't know, a new vori sweatshirt. Like, yeah, you, you probably

[00:06:01] Samantha Johnson: already have it. Yep. That's awesome. Okay, next one. How do we prepare again, as in this season, a lot of sickness.

[00:06:11] Samantha Johnson: So how do we prepare for sick season? I have two littles, three years old, seven months, and work from home. I have flexibility, but I always feel like I'm the one compromising.

[00:06:22] Tiffany Sauder: You probably are the one compromising. So one is just deciding that that is true and it might not be worth getting mad about.

[00:06:29] Samantha Johnson: Mm-hmm.

[00:06:29] Tiffany Sauder: Never, ever when the kids have gotten sick. Has JR. I stayed home from work ever in 16 years of having working kids. And you can like be annoyed about that or you can just accept it as true. Yeah. And I just accept it as true. They would rather have me, and I am And that's true. Yes. The kids would rather have me home and I'm probably better at it.

[00:06:47] Tiffany Sauder: You know what I mean? Mm-hmm. So I think one is just, if it's taking energy from you to feel annoyed, it's not serving anybody. So I would just sort of work on letting the annoyance go. In seasons that are busy or disrupted, I try to look at what can I cut in half? What can I delete and what can I make easy?

[00:07:09] Tiffany Sauder: So what can I cut in half? If I had like a full day of one-on-ones and they were all an hour long, I would say, we're moving all these to half an hour and I'm gonna put 'em all across an hour and a half instead of three hours. So I always look at that. What can I cut in half? Like I still do it, but maybe a hundred percent of my effort isn't required on this one day or this one week, and nothing is really lost.

[00:07:30] Tiffany Sauder: What can you delete again just for a season? And maybe doesn't, this recurring meeting doesn't have to happen this week. This thing that you, it doesn't have to happen. And then what can you make easy? And that's things like, uh, maybe on days like that you, my trainer just told me this actually, like, she loves kava or like Yep.

[00:07:49] Tiffany Sauder: Chipotle, or whatever it is. Enter it. Yes. When she, if she goes, if her husband's traveling, she gets two. One for today and one for tomorrow's lunch. Oh, that's a great idea. Yeah. Isn't that a great idea? So like, just make things that you know are gonna happen, like food. Mm-hmm. And just make it easy.

[00:08:03] Samantha Johnson: Yeah. She gets

[00:08:03] Tiffany Sauder: the sauces on the side.

[00:08:04] Tiffany Sauder: She heats it up. It's like that's, I know I can

[00:08:06] Samantha Johnson: play such a martyr when I'm homesick with the kids and it's, and my husband's always like, just like, just order food. Just make it easy. Like don't make it hard on yourself. Yeah. Or don't eat the leftover chicken nuggets. Like order food.

[00:08:15] Tiffany Sauder: Yeah.

[00:08:16] Samantha Johnson: Yeah. Instead of complaining about it.

[00:08:17] Tiffany Sauder: Yeah. So, and now maybe you need to find a little treat for yourself. Like you have sushi DoorDash or something. Mm-hmm. And it cost you $42 and that was insane for lunch. But it sort of made you feel like a human being. Yeah. So it's not gonna change. It's not gonna change. You can't make it go away. I think for me, it's removing the stressful energy.

[00:08:36] Tiffany Sauder: Mm-hmm. And saying, this is the plan. We're on a new plan. What can I cut? What can I cut in half and what can I make easy? Yep. And then you just do that. Yeah. Instead of lamenting that you're not working on Plan A. Yes. As you're not on plan A totally. Like you just gotta move through it and maybe you'll need to look ahead and negotiate like working late one evening or something like that to.

[00:08:58] Tiffany Sauder: Catch up. It made me think when our kids were young and I was like in it at Element Three, Tuesday night was my night. That was my pre-negotiated evening that I would work late. And so I didn't have to ask JR if I needed to work late on a project. I could do that if I needed to schedule a dinner. I knew what night to do that.

[00:09:15] Tiffany Sauder: It was just like Tuesday night was my night. Yep. And that helped me know that there was a place, if like. I was just kind of getting screwed on the way that my days were going, that I could work till my eyeballs fell outta my head. So yeah, you might have to have something like that. It's like, oh, there's a Saturday morning, you go work for three hours or something like that.

[00:09:32] Samantha Johnson: Yeah. I think this goes back to like implicit and explicit expectations. Yeah. Like if you haven't heard Tiffany talk on that, go back and listen to one of those episodes. She's done several and we can link a couple. But I think that helps a lot. Like if you make it explicit and have an agreement, then it's just gonna go smoother.

[00:09:47] Tiffany Sauder: Totally. Yeah, exactly. And. You know, our kids are more needy when they're sick, but they are not going to die if you take 20 minutes and go just like take a walk and get yourself back to center. When we turn into this like martyr to them and our energy just gets like crazy and out of balance, it's like nobody wins.

[00:10:06] Tiffany Sauder: Yeah. I'll just like be like, okay, this is where we are. It's kind of sucks. I'm on plant B, I'm not gonna be mad at my spouse because my kids are sick. It's not their fault either. Mm-hmm. That doesn't move anybody's energy in the right direction. What can I, yeah. Make simpler. How do I have one? Something fun to look forward to today over silly.

[00:10:21] Tiffany Sauder: It might be. Yeah. And just let it be. Yeah.

[00:10:24] Samantha Johnson: I had someone give me a good tip too as you're heading into the holidays. It's Liz, Lizzie. She said that the week before Christmas, like the days leading up to Christmas, she hires a sitter and pulls her kids out of daycare that week. Hmm. And it like allows them to get all the sickness out, or, oh, that's smart.

[00:10:39] Samantha Johnson: And just like not pick up anything that week. Yeah. Because it's like when you have like littles, it's like. Daycare is just like, they just get sick. So in order to try to get ahead of that, she just hires a sitter the week of Christmas and the days leading up to it, they're home with her. And I love that.

[00:10:53] Samantha Johnson: 'cause I was like, oh, that's amazing. Yeah. And then hopefully as you head into actual Christmas and all the things you have planned, it's like they, they've worked it out or they didn't pick up anything. And those few days leading up to it and everyone's good to go, that's a 10 outta love. Yeah,

[00:11:05] Tiffany Sauder: that's great.

[00:11:06] Tiffany Sauder: It's a system. And like put it on. I'm sure you live by your calendar. Like I put this stuff on my calendar as recurring. So like the Friday after Thanksgiving is decoration day. Mm-hmm. Like a recurring appointment on my calendar. Mm-hmm. If you're gonna get a sitter before the week before Christmas, probably like November 10th, you need to start scouting for that person.

[00:11:25] Tiffany Sauder: Like put it to do on your calendar and be like, oh, this is what I do. And you don't have to think about it so hard. It's just to do it. Right. Yep.

[00:11:31] Samantha Johnson: Okay. The next one, this is personal. Why did you decide to sell your current home and move and will your kids be in the same schools?

[00:11:38] Tiffany Sauder: Yes. Why did we decide? So we were, yeah, exploring a remodel with our existing home.

[00:11:43] Tiffany Sauder: We've been there 10 years, so when we moved in, I think this is like so interesting to think back. We had a 6-year-old and a 4-year-old. Mm-hmm. And only two kids. So it really fit our family. It was big for our family then, but, mm-hmm. So we didn't know that we would have four kids. We didn't know that we would've four girls.

[00:11:59] Tiffany Sauder: And so as the people have gotten bigger and there's more of us, it's like it just doesn't like fit us quite as well. So I would say that's the why, and we were on the edge of a remodel that wouldn't needed to have turned it into our forever home. But that was kind of the thought. And so I think when we sort really started thinking forward into our lives, like when all the girls come home with a husband and have kids, and assuming that that's sort of where life goes.

[00:12:25] Tiffany Sauder: We wanted a house that could contain us for the next 20 years and not just serve like our family as it looks today. So yeah, so we went and looked. We'll stay in Zionsville. Our kids will generally be in the same school district, so pretty minimum disruption I view, will go to a different middle school next year, but it's a transition year anyway.

[00:12:46] Tiffany Sauder: She's going from elementary to middle school, so.

[00:12:48] Samantha Johnson: Yeah. What was the question? Why did we do it? Yeah, why? And then will your kids be in the same school? We'll, we're in the same school,

[00:12:53] Tiffany Sauder: same community. So it's, if you've moved recently, you're like, yeah, it is really disruptive to put all of your things in a box.

[00:13:01] Tiffany Sauder: And move them. If you haven't moved recently, it's kind of like what isn't really that big of a deal, but it's like, it's kind of a lot of extra work. Yeah. And we're gonna be moving in with our in-laws, my in-laws, jr's parents, they'll be in Florida for most of it. This is another place, I would just say we're explicit versus implicit.

[00:13:18] Samantha Johnson: Mm-hmm.

[00:13:19] Tiffany Sauder: Is really serving our family well. Like we had a meeting with them beforehand, just getting really clear about how are we gonna handle, we get annoyed with each other. Some of these pinch points that I think are gonna come, we were able to talk about really proactively. And the girls are gonna have, you know, be on top of each other a little bit.

[00:13:35] Tiffany Sauder: They're all gonna have to share rooms. And so I was also working with them on implicit versus explicit. Like, you guys need to talk through where you think there's gonna be challenges and how you're gonna need to support each other in this environment for five months and get really explicit about that with each other.

[00:13:49] Tiffany Sauder: Yeah. 'cause I'm not going to play the. Like, I don't know, the referee on the sidelines, like, you guys, this is a great opportunity for you guys to learn how to do this. So yeah. Yeah. That's great. We're very excited about our new house.

[00:14:03] Samantha Johnson: Yes. I should say that of remodel. There's like a lot to go on, but it's exciting.

[00:14:07] Tiffany Sauder: Yes, it's a beautiful home. It's on four acres. We're really excited about that and we're getting to basically, yeah, redo the whole main floor. It's gonna be beautiful and very. Grateful for my husband's wisdom and where we ended up, I was a little bit of a brat, which I talked about in earlier, earlier episodes in the process.

[00:14:23] Tiffany Sauder: So I've learned a lot. Yeah.

[00:14:25] Samantha Johnson: Okay. You just talked about your girls, so this is a good one. What do you think is key to nurturing an authentic, rich relationship with your girls into adulthood?

[00:14:34] Tiffany Sauder: An authentic, rich relationship. Mm-hmm. I was talking with Ainsley. She's, she's our second one. Last night we were in the kitchen together and she's my most external like talker girl.

[00:14:46] Tiffany Sauder: She was saying she's been seeing, like talking to this boy for a few months and over Halloween he asked her to like be his boyfriend, like whatever girlfriend and. Within an hour of that happening, she texted me like mom, like, I won't say his name, but like he asked me to. And so she was, we were, we were, I, I don't know, kinda like debriefing that last night.

[00:15:08] Tiffany Sauder: Actually it started with, I asked, I'm like, so do like, what, what's different? Like, do you hold hands in the hallway? And she was like, mortified. She's like, no. I was like, I don't know, like what's the difference? You know what I mean? Yeah. Did we hold hands in the hallway? Yeah. Well, in high school. In high school?

[00:15:22] Tiffany Sauder: Not in middle school. School. Well, she's in high school. Oh gosh. A's in high school, but I'm just saying, I was like, I think we did that. Like she was like, no, you would never do that. Nobody would do that. I was like, I think people did that. Yeah, definitely. People did meet out in the hallways in the nineties.

[00:15:33] Tiffany Sauder: I don't think that was a lot in the nineties. People definitely held hands in the hallway. She wasn't saying like, that's gross. I don't wanna touch him. She was just like, that is not something a modern kid would do in the hallway. Yeah. Okay. Good to know. You would not do that. So good to know. So she, she was saying that one of her friends was like.

[00:15:50] Tiffany Sauder: Kinda talking to somebody. She's like, I would never tell my mom that I was like talking to somebody or dating and, and I, I essentially asked Ainsley like, well, why do you tell me? She's like, well, I want you to know what's happening. And I think that she tells me, because I don't overreact. Mm-hmm. It's like, I think that's a way for girls.

[00:16:08] Tiffany Sauder: That's the only kid I know how to raise. Like they're having their own emotion with whatever's going on in life, and as long as it's not sinful or going to hurt them. Just take it in. Like she's not need me to have an opinion about whether, you know, it's like, and he's a good kid and whatever it is, but it's like I, it's just like, I am excited for you 'cause you're excited and that's super cool.

[00:16:30] Tiffany Sauder: And I think one of the things we can do is just kind of get too involved. And I think I've done a good job of just like taking in what they're doing. Does that make sense? Yeah. Yes. And then I had this unmarked Ziploc bag of white powder. It was pretty full, and I was short, like 30 grams of protein. I was like, I think I said, I think this is a, I think this is protein powder that Nana gave me to try and I was like, dumping it in a thing.

[00:16:58] Tiffany Sauder: And she's like, or cocaine. And I was like, I guess we'll find out. And she's like, whoop, like let's go. And she's like, see, you don't freak out. When I say stuff like that, it's like some parents would freak out. I was like. Well, you're not doing cocaine, but I know that you know what it is. And that was pretty funny 'cause it's a huge badasses with white powder.

[00:17:15] Tiffany Sauder: And if that was cocaine, I'm going to be dead in 3, 2, 1. You know? And I think just like, yeah, I, I know you know what those things are like you live in the world and I think that just not overreacting makes it so that they tell you a wider array of things and. I think that's important. I think that we're also just really open with them about what we're doing as a family and I think they're as supportive of like what JR and I are doing and they have to fill in sometimes and sometimes help as we are of them.

[00:17:48] Tiffany Sauder: And I think that teamwork makes it so, I hope they feel like they have an understanding of what it's gonna look like to be an adult and it's not this big shock, shocking journey.

[00:17:57] Samantha Johnson: Yeah.

[00:17:57] Tiffany Sauder: I was telling a young woman I met with this morning that my oldest daughter is very. Receptive and she came over and gave me a big hug and she's like, mom, are you stressed?

[00:18:07] Tiffany Sauder: And I was like, I am. She's like, you're doing great. And I was like, thanks honey. Like, and I just think that's like for a 16-year-old to see me as a person and me not have to be like, no honey, I'm not stressed. Like everything's fine. It's like, no, I am. That's like gonna be a normal thing that she's gonna deal with too.

[00:18:25] Tiffany Sauder: Mm-hmm. When she's an adult is she's gonna be kind of stressed. I don't feel like I need to shield her from that. I don't need to be a crazy person. Yeah. But yeah, I'm kind of distracted. I'm not listening Great. Right now. And my head is somewhere else. And you were super perceptive to see that. Yeah. And thanks.

[00:18:40] Tiffany Sauder: That was kind of you to say. I'm doing great. Yes. Because I don't know if I am, you know, so I don't know if that's very concise. So I'm sorry I made you sit through all that, but I think it's just not overreacting. I think it's being honest with them about your good days and your bad days. I had someone tell me once, do you tell your kids as much about where you're failing as it is where you're winning?

[00:19:00] Tiffany Sauder: And I think that that's like just normalizing that part of being an adult. And I think also be fun. Like be a place they want to be. Have good ideas, be creative, engage with them in a way that is relevant to them, I think is also a really, really, really big deal. I think that's where kids. Go to their friends to only have fun when you, you as parents don't show up with like tickets to somewhere Cool.

[00:19:28] Tiffany Sauder: Or I, I don't know, it doesn't have to be gifts and stuff, but just like show them that life can be an adventure. Yeah. And I think that we do a decent job of, mm-hmm.

[00:19:41] Tiffany Sauder: I wanna take a quick moment to thank my partners at Share Your Genius. For the past four years, they have been an incredible part of my journey behind the microphone. Share Your Genius is a content and podcast production agency that helps leaders and brands bring their message to life. So whether you're trying to find your voice, develop a content strategy, or get your leader behind a microphone, they're gonna help you make it simple, strategic, and impactful.

[00:20:05] Samantha Johnson: Alright, a random one. Uh, I thought this one must be planted, but, oh, no. 'cause I, we just talked about this. Do you have a non-negotiable morning drink routine? Oh, I do. We did just talk about this. This is not a plant, not a plant.

[00:20:21] Tiffany Sauder: So this has been a big year of like health for me, which I think we're gonna maybe do a deep dive into that maybe early next year.

[00:20:27] Tiffany Sauder: But I do, I wake up and I drink like 12 ounces of water with a half a lemon squeeze in it. It sounds so extra. A pinch of Himalayan salt when I remember. And that's the first thing that goes in my body. It's supposed to be good for you. So my trainer tells me just like setting your digestive system and then.

[00:20:49] Tiffany Sauder: This is TMI, but I have a hard, like I have a hard time being regular. I have a hard time pooping on the regular. It's like been a thing for me my whole life. My trainer has helped me understand, and it's true that something warm that goes into your body makes your body. Did you know this? Yes. Makes you poop?

[00:21:04] Tiffany Sauder: So I generally have a warm cup of tea or coffee and then I try to just sit and be quiet for like, just like kind of let my nervous system just be still.

[00:21:14] Samantha Johnson: Mm-hmm.

[00:21:15] Tiffany Sauder: For 15 minutes. So I don't like getting out like a blender, a mixer. I don't like all that kind of stuff. So I'm just like a cup of coffee and my lemon.

[00:21:25] Tiffany Sauder: I'm gonna be honest with you, it took me a little while to love it because coffee after lemon is not like the best flavor moment. Yeah. So you go from like, I always brush my teeth a second. I get outta bed, so I like go from toothpaste to lemon, which is like kind of an assertive combination. Yes. And then I go from lemon to coffee.

[00:21:44] Tiffany Sauder: Which is kind of an assertive you. You do coffee, not tea generally. Coffee, sometimes tea, but generally coffee. I like it better. And it doesn't take as long the, like steeping. Yes. I don't know. Mm-hmm. But that's where I'm at. There it is. Where the drink routine. She also told me, it's all, she also told me, ladies, I, I think generally women have more problems with, seems like it bowels.

[00:22:07] Tiffany Sauder: It's gross. You should have an eight to 12 inch poop every day.

[00:22:12] Samantha Johnson: Yeah. When you told me this, I was shocked. Two a day. Right. You should be going twice

[00:22:17] Tiffany Sauder: these blessed people. So we're on an eight to 12 inch. Yeah. Watch. Yeah.

[00:22:25] Samantha Johnson: Watch, watch, watch, watch party. Well that, you

[00:22:28] Tiffany Sauder: know,

[00:22:29] Samantha Johnson: it's getting wear Q on, so yeah, I don't know.

[00:22:33] Samantha Johnson: You learn new things every day. Yeah. And that's like stark contrast. Like what was your morning routine prior to this?

[00:22:38] Tiffany Sauder: Like would you just like get up and go? I would get up, put my workout clothes on and be sweating within eight minutes of getting out of bed. Yeah. That's my current routine. So like up and out, like I would like get up, put my clothes on, chug something.

[00:22:51] Tiffany Sauder: Uh, like a spark, a chug. A spark, and then be working, be running or on the bike or doing something. Yes. Literally within 10 minutes of getting up. Yeah. And she's saying, um, yeah, my perimenopausal body is not gonna like that. Yeah. And so they say, yeah. So I'm, I still move pretty fast during my day, but in my morning I try to go slower and then yeah.

[00:23:13] Tiffany Sauder: Still get a workout in afterwards, but I have to get up earlier.

[00:23:15] Samantha Johnson: Yeah,

[00:23:16] Tiffany Sauder: for sure.

[00:23:17] Samantha Johnson: So

[00:23:17] Tiffany Sauder: you

[00:23:17] Samantha Johnson: just like accept it. Yeah. All right. The next few are for the ambitious woman, trying to do it all. Okay. When you are successful, ambitious, and full of ideas, but also a mom, wife, and friend, how do you narrow down your ideas and focus on the most impactful?

[00:23:35] Tiffany Sauder: Well, I think you have to figure out in this season of your life, how is most impactful? Fine, because that has changed in seasons of my life. There are times when most impactful men go to the place of highest financial opportunity. There are times when most impactful men support JR. In the most flexible way possible.

[00:24:00] Tiffany Sauder: There are times when most impactful meant be available for the kids, like has to really, really changed in seasons. And so I think as you're going into the next year and this season. You have to get really clear with yourself about what does most impactful mean right now. Because that answer will change as your kids change in season, as your own age and opportunities change and as you need to sort of support and be available to the people around you.

[00:24:30] Tiffany Sauder: I think you have to start there. I don't wanna be too indulgent here, but a, as I am looking at 2026, I think we're gonna do an episode on like kind of where life and is going. I mean, I have a lot of ambitions about what I want this project to become and the opportunity that I see that is available, that the, the lives and the women, the families, that I believe that we can help.

[00:24:53] Tiffany Sauder: And in some ways I feel a responsibility to help, but I cannot do that at the expense of my own family and my own relationships and my own health and my own. And so. Being really clear with myself about what are the boundaries that need to be in place if I'm gonna go say yes to some of these things.

[00:25:12] Tiffany Sauder: And I think when we look at what were the words,

[00:25:15] Samantha Johnson: successful, ambitious, full of ideas, the last few words of it, oh, how do you narrow down your ideas and focus on the most impactful

[00:25:23] Tiffany Sauder: in this season? Mm-hmm. Impactful. Yeah, impactful. What are the goals that you need to have, but also what are the boundaries that need to be in place to be able to go do that?

[00:25:31] Tiffany Sauder: So let me see the words again. When you're successful, how do you narrow down? So I think the first thing I wanna speak about was focus on the most impactful. You have to decide in this season, what is the most impactful purpose? Am Emily, your own health. I mean, there was like coming out of COVID and after having Quincy and feeling like just like I had been beat up, I needed a little season of like rest that was the most impactful.

[00:26:02] Tiffany Sauder: Mm-hmm. So this idea of how do you narrow down your ideas and focus, I think that question is, you cannot move to the next project until the one you're working on is successful and self-sustaining. And there were things that I've, ideas I've had in my head for a, a long time, ambitions I've had in my heart, desires that I've wanted to do or.

[00:26:32] Tiffany Sauder: 10 years, but I had to make sure Element Three was outta place. Like it was my first commitment. It needed to be financially sustaining. It needed to not be burdened with debt. It needed to have a leadership team that knew how to grow it, and I had to gently remove myself. Like I needed time to do all of those things.

[00:26:50] Tiffany Sauder: And that stuff took me like five years, three to five years. Like it was not an overnight thing. You look at where I'm at today and it's like, oh, you just went from Element Three to this. Like no, there was a very intentional process. Mm-hmm. Of getting that project set up. It's a company, but it's a, it's a project of my career, you know, to build this agency.

[00:27:10] Tiffany Sauder: And once that's going, then I can go do some of these things like invest in other businesses, support other entrepreneurs, serve on boards, launch the life of Ann. But even as I've gone full time into Life of And there's things I've taken off my plate because they don't serve where I'm going. So I think when it talks about editing the ideas that you have.

[00:27:31] Tiffany Sauder: Start with making sure the things that you are committed to are successful. Because I think for me, at least when I was, when stuff was hard, I felt like I was failing When Element Three like kind of sucked. Those were the seasons where I was looking for places where I was wanted, where I felt like people, you know, one, like my ego was like looking for a sandbox of success, and so I was like, yeah, I should go be a speaker right now.

[00:27:58] Tiffany Sauder: Like, no, that's not serving Element Three at all. It's serving my need to be needed. It's serving a little bit of short-term revenue, but it's like not really doing anything Right. So I think sometimes our fear of fear of failure can come up with a lot of ways to distract us from the really hard thing that we need to solve in front of us.

[00:28:16] Samantha Johnson: Yeah. So, okay, we talked about 2026. What's something you're doing to set goals and intentions for 2026?

[00:28:25] Tiffany Sauder: Yeah, so I did a episode with Brian and I was, I don't know, just kind of exporting some things and, and he reminded me that it is not actually incremental growth that is exciting to us. It's when you put things in front of you where it's like that mountain's worth climbing, that's worth doing.

[00:28:39] Tiffany Sauder: And I think as you and I, Sam, were working through Life of And, it's like an incremental step, feel like the safest thing to do. But neither one of us were getting super jazzed about it. And so I think as it relates to what am I doing around goal setting, it's, it is having the courage to say, I don't have to figure out how I'm gonna get there right now.

[00:28:58] Tiffany Sauder: I just have to figure out what gets my body feel like, oh my word. I would literally die if that was what happened. And so that was this first step was just like, what do I want? Mm-hmm. To have to look like. And I'm trying to not solve just for my professional aspect of my life, right. But to really set goals.

[00:29:16] Tiffany Sauder: Personally with my family so that I'm managing those together and not independently of one another. And the other is like, what are my boundaries? And you and I both talked about that and like, what are your goals for next year and what are your boundaries? Because we will solve inside the container of what we believe.

[00:29:32] Tiffany Sauder: And I told you this yesterday, Sam, I was like, if we believe it's gonna take us both a hundred hours a week to get to these goals, that is exactly what we will solve towards.

[00:29:43] Samantha Johnson: Mm-hmm.

[00:29:43] Tiffany Sauder: If we believe we can get to these goals with. 35 hours a week, then that's what we'll solve towards, like what we believe is what we will do.

[00:29:50] Tiffany Sauder: And so practicing that, you know, we have some really ambitious goals and I, it is not a season where I want to travel very much.

[00:29:59] Samantha Johnson: Mm-hmm.

[00:29:59] Tiffany Sauder: And there are some really intoxicating ways to make money and to spread this message that require me to be gone all the time. And my ego. Looks over that cliff all the time because it's like, oh, it'd be interesting and I'd be important and I'd do all these cool things, but it does not fit my boundaries.

[00:30:16] Tiffany Sauder: And so I think when you define it, it forces your brain to solve differently. And we've come up with some really creative ways, I think, to be like, deploy this because we've decided these are my goals and these are my boundaries. So that's what I would encourage you to do to find those two things, your goals and your boundaries, and then you behave it and you manage it.

[00:30:36] Tiffany Sauder: And. Make it happen. Yeah. That easy. That easy?

[00:30:42] Samantha Johnson: Alright, let's try to squeeze in two more questions. So many questions are so good. Good. I know I'm gonna have to skip some, so we'll have to do a second episode or we'll come up with something. Okay. But we'll get 'em. Do you have a home manager? So someone was listening to a prior episode.

[00:30:55] Samantha Johnson: Yes. Do you still have a home manager? And is there like a company you can recommend?

[00:31:00] Tiffany Sauder: I wish there was a company that I could recommend. There used to be, yes. I think that's the one they listened to, and it's not around anymore. So yes, I have a house manager. She comes twice a week, Tuesdays and Thursdays, or 10 hours.

[00:31:15] Tiffany Sauder: So one day is four hours and one is six. And it is a huge lift to our lives. It helps us eat out very little. It helps the house stay clean and tidy. She does all of the sheets. She does all the rugs and she does lots of special projects for me like returns and wrapping gifts and when I do Christmas cards, stamping those like just stuff that you just don't administratively have time to do 'cause you're never home.

[00:31:43] Tiffany Sauder: She'll like schedule the carpet cleaning and like she just manages a lot of that stuff. And our back stock, she's connected to my Amazon account and she'll change light bulbs and just all that kind of stuff that comes with having a busy household. Cleans up after parties and a part-time house manager works great for us.

[00:32:01] Tiffany Sauder: I don't know what I'd personally do with a full-time one that feels like a lot, but I know some have it. Ours is 10 hours a week and you kind of have to learn like anything how to manage them and stay ahead of 'em. Mm-hmm. So that when they come, they know what to do. And so I talk often about having a planning meeting with yourself once a week and in my planning meeting.

[00:32:21] Tiffany Sauder: I look at the week, I look at the calendar, who needs to be where, what are we going to eat each day? And that is when I essentially script out what Paige is gonna do. And I'd say 60% of what she does every week is the same. Yeah, 60 to 70%. And the other part flexes, based on what I need, how I would go find one without a company is I would go on try to find a local Facebook page.

[00:32:46] Tiffany Sauder: A lot of people who are nannies. I also have experience with being a house manager, and so they're looking for some type of an in-home job and oftentimes you can find like house managers or people who are connected to house managers in that world. I would also go on care.com. In the past, they've also had house manager positions, and next door is another place that I found 'em.

[00:33:10] Tiffany Sauder: So okay, we've had ours for like two and a half years. She does a great job and you just have to know it's like anything else. You have to give them feedback. Like all teenagers right now wear sweatpants and my girls all have very long legs. And so it's like when they go through the dryer, they get shrunk.

[00:33:28] Samantha Johnson: Yeah.

[00:33:28] Tiffany Sauder: And so it's like, we can't dry the sweatpants anymore. And she looks at me like, what are we gonna do to have sweatpants hanging all over the house? I'm like, kind of, I was like. Put 'em in the dryer for 10 minutes. Stretch out the fabric. 'cause it gets kind of tight. Yes. And then let let 'em air dryer for like the last 20 minutes.

[00:33:44] Tiffany Sauder: It feels very tedious to tell somebody how to dry a pair of sweatpants. But I've got four girls who wear sweatpants. They care very much. They care very much. And I'm paying for them. And it's like, that's how I'm managing her to an outcome that supports my family. And I'm like, but that's how she'll do it now every single time.

[00:34:00] Tiffany Sauder: And it's fixed. But you have to give them feedback. She doesn't have a pile of teenage girls. Wearing sweatpants. Yeah. She doesn't see them with them on ever. Right. Yeah. So she, you know what I mean? So she's not gonna be like, oh, your sweatpants are short. I sh like, you, you have to tell her. She doesn't ever see the kids.

[00:34:14] Tiffany Sauder: Yeah. She's here, you know, when she's at school. Yeah. So I think just realizing it is another person to manage, not in a bad way, but in a way that you have to take responsibility for and they wanna do what you want for them. We're super picky. Like, my girls don't like stuff that she cooks for us sometimes.

[00:34:28] Tiffany Sauder: I'm like, I need you to chop the onion smaller. Yeah. It feels ridiculous, but it's like, if you're gonna cook meals for me for five years, I'll just soon tell you. Yeah. And she just soon know. Yeah. So you just have to like know there's a constant feedback loop that has to be.

[00:34:42] Samantha Johnson: Yep. Okay. Last question we'll do today.

[00:34:45] Samantha Johnson: Okay. What's a recent moment you are prep most proud of?

[00:34:48] Tiffany Sauder: Oh geez. I think I, I was traveling a week or two ago for a big speaking engagement and. It just so happened that JR was also, he didn't get home until midnight, one of the nights that I was gone. And so the big girls had to put the littles to bed. It wasn't like they were home overnight, but he got home at like midnight.

[00:35:09] Tiffany Sauder: Mm-hmm. So they did dinner, cleaned up, put the little girls to bed. It was kind of a lot. And it was like during a school week, and so it was flying home, texting with one of the girls, and I just said, Hey, I just wanna say thanks for, I know it's a little extra when I'm away, and I really appreciate you stepping in.

[00:35:27] Tiffany Sauder: And she texted me back, she said, mom, I'm proud of you and I love watching you do your thing and it's gonna make me kind of teary. But I think that this idea of being a team is a really strong art of the identity that I want my girls to say it felt like to be in our family. Mm-hmm. And that like, they see me as a person, not just their mom.

[00:35:49] Tiffany Sauder: And I am, I feel really proud of that. Not because it's like, look, I've taken my space, but like. I think I've done it in a way that it doesn't feel like I'm mad mom's away. I hate these things that she's doing. Mm-hmm. But they see that it gives me a lot of energy and that it gives them, uh, I think a more whole mom in return.

[00:36:09] Samantha Johnson: Yeah.

[00:36:10] Tiffany Sauder: That's awesome.

[00:36:11] Samantha Johnson: Alright, that's a wrap. Like I said, we didn't get through all of 'em. Can you believe that? There are so many questions. Amazing. Thank you for submitting.

[00:36:17] Tiffany Sauder: You guys are amazing. I mean, honestly, I feel just like so blessed by this project. I think. You know, just you do something and you just think maybe it will help people and maybe, you know, maybe what you're living will resonate with others and to just feel it back.

[00:36:38] Tiffany Sauder: And these questions are so thoughtful. So just appreciate it. It's very fun. All right, well if you like this episode, leave of review. Close this out. So you say, yeah, download the gift guide if you would like, if you need ideas, some inspiration for. We don't have affiliate links. We're not that organized.

[00:36:53] Tiffany Sauder: Just sharing, yeah. Stuff that we love.

[00:36:57] Samantha Johnson: That would

[00:36:57] Tiffany Sauder: be

[00:36:57] Samantha Johnson: amazing.

[00:36:58] Tiffany Sauder: If we could, that would be amazing. But we, no, it's like literally just stuff we love. I don't know who makes money off of it, but not us. So thanks for joining us guys and really just, yeah, thanks for being here.

[00:37:10] Tiffany Sauder: Thanks for listening to the Life of And this is your weekly reminder to keep making bold choices, saying clear yeses and holding space for what matters most. As always, if you like this episode, I'd love for you to drop a review and share it with your friend. It's the fastest way that we can grow the show.

[00:37:26] Tiffany Sauder: Thanks for joining us. I'll see you next time.